Aaron Dembski-Bowden

Don't worry. None of this blood is mine.

Hey. Hey, you. Name this bear.

IMG_6004

This is Annah. Her real name is Savannah. Increasingly, I just call her Scout.

Other names include: Chubbs, Chubbalina, Chubbalina Fatface of Plumpington, and Bubbles. Or, as her brother Shakes calls her, Z’vanna.

I made her. I’m given to understand that Katie helped. Annah is a modestly sized human baby-being, who spends her time teething, crying, and demanding to be carried around like some sort of Ptolemaic queen, like I was her fucking litter bearer or something.

Look at that morose bear, right there. What’s his name? I don’t know. Help me, internet people.

Name that bear. The best suggestion wins.

December 29, 2015 - Posted by | Uncategorized

56 Comments »

  1. She is beautiful! Congratulations!

    I love naming things! I have two suggestions:
    1) Caramel the Churlish
    2) Butterscotch the Comforter

    Comment by Amber C. | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  2. That bear right there, that bear is a Chauncey Von Snuffles, if I ever saw one.

    Comment by Sigma | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  3. Brown face

    Comment by Britt | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  4. Chongo

    Comment by bfosburg | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  5. well you and the bear do share a passing resemblance so “Grumbles the Deadline passer” has a nice ring to it …. or you could take the easy way out and go with Lotara, Cyrene , or any of the other female characters you’ve given birth to in your book

    Comment by Ben Chambers | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  6. Mr Cuddlesworth Esq

    or

    Mortimer

    after Mortimer “Morte” Rictusgrin
    (Planescape Torment RPG FTW)

    Comment by Sharrow | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  7. He looks like a Gustav to me.

    Comment by whipplor | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  8. Ruffian

    Comment by Mark Lund | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  9. Sethington Smythe….

    Comment by shavenwookiee | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  10. Leonard Bearnstein

    Comment by Greg Collins | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  11. Considering the recent news, Lemmy?

    Comment by Joe | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  12. Baron Von Teddywinkle

    Comment by James Grunsell | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  13. Your child’s custodian bear should be given a name denoting its stature, such as:

    Rogal Dorn, Ferrus Manus, Ezrah, Mkvenner, Colm, Macaroth, Malcador, Ibram, Arbites Dredd…

    Comment by Magos XQ8//Arpeba (@XQ8_tweets) | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  14. Belgium. Or Scrambles the Death Dealer.

    Comment by John | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  15. Ragamuffin!

    Comment by Jeff | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  16. Morris. Morose Morris

    Comment by Todd carrigan | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  17. Stuffedmosis the Unassuming, greatest pharaoh Annahgyptus

    Comment by Lord Tharand | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  18. Doctor Shaggathaggron’rhulagh’f’hagûn McFluffy…. Dr. Shaggy McFluffy.

    Comment by Dies | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  19. Kharn the Betrayer. Just look at those cold dead eyes filled with unholy rage.

    Comment by John | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  20. Abearddon

    Comment by Dan | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  21. Swede McButlerhead.

    Comment by Matt Woodsmith | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  22. Dr. Teddington Von Cuddlesworth

    Comment by Gareth Bradshaw | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  23. That would be Atticus, surely. Smiles.

    Comment by nicola vincent-abnett | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  24. Bjorn the bear-handed

    Comment by Craig Glover | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  25. Bamse, (kinda pronounced ‘bamsa’) – it’s Danish for teddy bear 🙂
    Or I might even suggest my favourite bear’s name – Snoozles! Or Emperor Cuddlebuns…

    Comment by Lucinda Green | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  26. Chuckles the Discombobulated, Devourer of Souls.
    Chuck for short.

    Comment by megasolipsist | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  27. Byre

    Comment by Daniel | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  28. Undecimus? 😛

    Comment by Viridia | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  29. McLoving perhaps?

    Comment by Forkmaster | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  30. Sevatar the Bearatar, obvs.

    Comment by Shteve | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  31. My instinct is to go for “Bear” but I am the person who called their family pets by their proper nouns and I can appreciate if you don’t want to confuse matters in that way. Bjorn works as an obvious on the nose alternative but I am on an inuit bender for naming at the moment so there is “K’eyush” which means bear cub or the much easier to pronounce “Shesh” and “Sos”which means brown bear or just bear respectively.

    Comment by schaferlord | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  32. Aisling

    Comment by Daye Kaniel | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  33. I’m feeling Jimbo. But when have my feelings ever counted for anything on the Internet? Anyway, how much say does Katie have in this? I’ve always imagined that you’d be slightly whipped (especially while you’re raising two kids), so probably a fair bit. But are you two wanting a more feminine name since it’s for your daughter? Or just whatever takes your fancy?

    Comment by Mitchell Brazel | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  34. Mumbles

    Comment by Stephen Bissett | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  35. Ursus Claw? That way when she is older she can shout “fire the ursus claw” whilst launching it at someone’s head, and as she is little it will be cute as opposed to pre-meditated assault.

    Otherwise Abearddon

    Comment by Dan | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  36. Chubbacca?

    Comment by Brian | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  37. The ones that sprung to mind:

    Bob, Damien, Lord Gort the Angry, Rudolph, Huggy, Argh, Gorefiend, Snuggles.

    Comment by ravenswingthog | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  38. Either Gorefiend, or Snuggles.

    Comment by ravenswingthog | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  39. Geoff.

    Comment by Karl MkVII | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  40. Dan 😉

    Comment by Jezza McJez of the Clan McJez | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  41. Bearbarossa.

    Comment by triceratopping | December 29, 2015 | Reply

  42. Bloodbutter the Everchurned.

    Comment by Sheokronath | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  43. He reminds me of Marvin The Paranoid Android. So Marvin.

    Comment by Just Dave. | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  44. The bear reminds me of Marvin The Paranoid Android. So Marvin.

    Comment by Dave Clarke | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  45. Saul Tarvitz
    Or
    Centuribear

    Comment by WanderingPariah | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  46. Doogum

    Comment by Zack S | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  47. He should be Malcador, because that would make her…

    Comment by Chinh | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  48. Roosevelt, or Rosy, for short

    Comment by Severian | December 30, 2015 | Reply

  49. That bear needs a cool name, so here are my suggestions. Jonathan Joseph (JoJo for short), Spike Spiegel. DIOOOOO! Bubbles, although that could be confusing.

    Although I’d personally name it Tezcatlipoca, or Poca for short. An angry Aztec god who commanded jaguars to eat all the giants on earth.

    Comment by Thought I'd go non-warhammer, just for a lil variation | December 31, 2015 | Reply

  50. Ogma of the Tuatha Dé Danann.

    Comment by Dave | January 1, 2016 | Reply

  51. Philadelphia the Bear. Or Marvin. Or Moriarty.

    Comment by Chris Robinson | January 2, 2016 | Reply

  52. Why not name it after the 13 Apostle, Rufus? Also, greetings from Arizona, Aaron; a wretched hive of scum and villainy that’s so damn bright that nocturnal life styles become preferable.

    Comment by Kyle Nguyen | January 5, 2016 | Reply

  53. Bjorn?

    Comment by Vijay | January 5, 2016 | Reply

  54. Maugetar – harvester of bad dreams.

    Or Slaine.

    Comment by Chris Robinson | January 7, 2016 | Reply

  55. Dan Abnett

    Comment by Krukesh the suntanned | January 8, 2016 | Reply

  56. Definitely a Monty or Montgomery to strangers.

    Comment by Steve Williams | January 15, 2016 | Reply


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